-get a job this summer
-buy a new camera
-hopefully underwater one for diving!
-get certified
-take a lot of notes out of my bible lit. book!
-study biology
-learn calculus so i dont fail the next quiz
-make a powerpoint for a presentation on wife of bath
-paper!
-get my oil changed when i get home
-schoolwork!
-decorations for BCM formal
-go to the beach this weekend
-see leatherheads
-sit back and notice different things about people
-see old friends
-buy a new ipod
-new music!
-dance while slightly intoxicated
-study for finals
.........once all of these things are done. i'll feel a little bit better.

I am so very sick of schoolwork. Anddd it is almost summer! Which means I get to see MSI and go to the beach and hangout with people i havent seen in a long time and WORK. wow. the surprises that await me. I have to wake up early tomorrow. eww. i cant wait until my classes dont start until 11. i hate hate mornings. there is nothing i can do about it. i really really just could go by life without seeing another early morning. Some of the earliest mornings I have seen were with Audrey. she can atest to this. i need to wash my face and read a whole lot more and go to bed! i didnt get to do my calc. oops. fucking calculus ruins my superb life. I can't wait to see the deep deep ocean again this summer. goodnight~ Kris

Sooooo today was good. i didnt take a nap all freaking day and i think i had 4-5 hours of sleep and i'm a fucking pussy so i think i drifted through life today. but whatever it's OKAY to drift through life. no one knows enough to tell me otheriwise... and if they do please fucking let me know. p.s. i tell people the most truth when i'm not so sober. and plus i really dont care the most when i'm not so sober. two amazing and horrible combinations. mixed together...... what does that make? it makes for selfish selfsih thinking i suppose. so i suppose i am just stupid and should have given up a long time ago. but maybe revelations never quite did it for me. yes i know! The fucking turning of the fucking world never quite did it for me!!!!!!! i would just like for eveyone to realize that you are ALL an asshole in some sort of way. i know the way i am.... and you should realize the way in which you are an asshole too! if you really can find no way then maybe you should go fucking choke on life. i'm not being violent. just truthfull.
I even apologize when i dont want to.... do you know what thats like? thats like fuck myself fuck life i'm gonna go against what i think and apologize because maybe just maybe everyone else(two people) are right and i'm not! i usedd to always always listen to dear prudence to make me feel better. soooooo. let's see if it works again. i shoudl only need one song in life with this much impact... but sometimes i just feel like i need another one. maybe. two wouldnt commit the same feelings though. they would be different. and that just wouldnt work! so i only need one song in life. good thing no one ever told me another one! and i discovered this one to make me feel so much better.
Anyways.... it's amazing how much some person puts something out there and doesnt even realize the impact it has on others. or not so impact at all. i would love to know someone with way more of a personal imapact than me from a same song. jsut so i can see how fucking stupid i was being and how fucking shallow i was taking the words. that would be amazing. and what else would be amazing..........
I really dont care if you are soooooooo more intelligent than me because i feel like amazing things are understood better by people who realize that they can never be understood all the way. NEVER NEVer neveR. AND PEOPLE WHO think that they can be understood all the way are the most fucking retarded fuckers on the face of the earth. more retarded than retards. cause you can learn a lot from everyone. not kidding. goddddddd people are so stuuuuupid. and so am i... and believe me i relaize that that fucking extra emphasis on extra syllables makes me even more fucking retarded for not knowing how to express it. but at least i have the feelings when some people dont at all. do people really live like that? really???? yes extra question marks makes me more interesting! duh havent u dumb fuckers realized that? jesus christ.all the time i just think that the ocean is way more beautiful than any human could ever ever be. i swear. it is. i'm a fucking hippie at heart. but i cant embrace it. why?? i dunno! I'm way to fucking young even of a specialized system to know that. yep. words are things PEOPLE made up. so that is why i really feel like i rely on FEELINGS way more. even the most beautiful prose, poem, book, song, you have ever read was made up and unknown of your own kind. and once you realize how incredibly unkowling you are...... you still are not smart! so fuck smart people who thing they know the world. fuck douchebags. this is exactly why i hate them. but more so why i hat them all at the same time. actually i dont even hate them. i just feel like i have given up. i'm sorry. i know that you must think it is such a depressing thing. but really... i can be so happy just KNOWING all this nonsense. and making up more nonsense! if anyone has read through this and are like OH DUH KRIS did you just realize this??? NO I FUCKING DIDNT. i have always known it. and please go trip yourselfs and brake a bone. i hate you. But... I love everone else who loves me
Anddddd you know what I just cant stand ( there I go adding extra ddd's). I cant stand people who wait around to see if college kids or others make the most money. and how much they spend in the fucking process. for that matter i love you but whyyyyyyyyy i know you know so much more than that. so dont even think like that when i know you are better than most people! i still love you either way. cause i'm stupid and drunk.

I'm terribly sorry, but I have some very old pictures on this site. The last journal entry I did was from high school? very nice. So today I finished my formal lab report. It was terribly boring and I did not feel like writing it when I had to. It was on what determines sex expression in the homosporous fern ceratopteris richardii... i know not so interesting? And besides that I watched Top Chef and ate tons of pizza... slightly more entertaining! I just can't decide if I want to be pre-med or not! and the longer i wait the more hard classes at once i'll be taking... which is what most likely is going to end up happening. But maybe I'll have a revelation this summer... not like in the bible but you know. I have a lab quiz tomorrow I am procrastinating studying for! And I have a major test Friday.. which means I can't go out Thursday night and I really need to too. Although I don't need to get as drunk as I've been getting. mm hm hm no comments. My calc and bib lit grades succcck. o well. I dunno who would actually read this it's been very boring!
I can't wait to go out on the boat this summer.. and see pretty fishies. huuuh! cant cant cant wait! fuck. i need to see some coral reefs. ar. god. At least I'm going to the beach Saturday... I just have so much work to do before then. I'm sorry but my journal entry is more for me than you. Because it is really me venting and figuring out everything I have to do... to make myself feel less stressed (even though I don't think that is it stressed that I am), and it is not at all me writing an interesting or even entertaining journal entry for my oh so not devoted fans. shit! I have to write a paper this weekend too. i almost forgot. On To The Lighthouse, whichhhhh i cannot decide if i liked. I guess I liked it. I know what it is! It was a book that was almost like ones I really like! It had all the potential to be like the books I really like.. but not enough slightly insane character. I know what youre thinking right now! Youre probably thinkiing omg to the lighthouse had tons of that shit! it just wasnt enough for me... I'm terribly sorry if i'm offending you right now. But that is because I am working on being nicer. It's a real challenge when youre drruuunnk btw. be careful.
oh and by the way. boys are oh so ummmmm not there? Which I don't mind that much. I can't ever imagine me being boy picky, but maybe I am. who cares. it's just that one day i'm going to need like 5 kids. and a really big old fashioned bathtub. A boy just like me would be preferrable... only one in a way different way. And I want one with crazy tattoos of weird characters on his arms so i can fall asleep in his arms and dream about them coming to life. Thats all i want. is that weird? yeah probably. It's a good thing that most no one will read this... and if they do they will never make it this far. ahhahaha.
So this is what I like to do at night when I can't sleep! I love it in fact. I think I'll do it every night i cant sleep. which btw is exactly every night!

*Dammit Michael kicked my spanish book across the other side of the room and I dunno where it is (Vix)

*lol yea her teeth are all nasty because she smokes and I'm not talking about tabaco cigarettes (by Vix.. bout McGraw haha)

* o god I feel naked without my phone(Vix)

* God there are so many annoying people in this class(Vix)

* She couldnt send us to a more horrible place because the dean's office is less boring than this.(Kris10)

*Chris is so effin hott (I wonder...)